Movie quotes taken out of context are hit or miss: some carry themselves well as individual punchlines, while others falter without the situational exactness they have within the film as a whole. Even so, a great many of these gems deserve to be shared, as I’ve decided to do below with a few movies I’ve watched recently: In Bruges, The Last Days of Disco, and Intolerable Cruelty.
Some are funny, some ironic, and some just completely true. Check them out below! Oh, and also, a word of warning: some inappropriate language does follow, so if you are prone to take offense, well, you’ve been warned.
Ken: Coming up?
Ray: What’s up there?
Ken: The view.
Ray: The view of what? The view of down here? I can see that down here.
Ken: Ray, you are about the worst tourist in the whole world.
Ray: Ken, I grew up in Dublin. I love Dublin. If I grew up on a farm, and was retarded, Bruges might impress me but I didn’t, so it doesn’t.
Natalie: Harry. Harry! It’s a inanimate f***ing object!
Harry: You’re an inanimate f***ing object!
Chloe: He doesn’t like being called a midget. He prefers dwarf.
Ray: This is exactly my point! People going around calling you a midget when you want to be called a dwarf. Of course you’re going to blow your head off.
Ray: You can’t sell horse tranquilizers to a midget!
Ray: One gay beer for my gay friend, one normal beer for me because I am normal.
The Last Days of Disco
Charlotte: This will motivate me to get a better job in television, which is where my interests truly lie. I’ve watched television all my life.
Josh: A lot of people like to say they won’t take no for an answer. I just wanted you to know that I’m not one of them; I can be easily discouraged. I will take no for an answer.
Charlotte: Anything I did that was wrong, I apologize for. But anything I did that was not wrong, I don’t apologize for.
Alice: I love the company! They’ve been so great to us there.
Dan: Well, I don’t know; we were exploited. But they were nice about it.
Charlotte: What if in a few years we don’t marry some corporate lawyer? What if we marry some meatball, like you? Or not you, personally, but someone with similarly low socioeconomic prospects?
Josh: If you were a betting person, would you say, “That tortoise won against the hare; in future races I’m backing him”? No. That race was almost certainly a fluke and afterwards the tortoise is still a tortoise, and the hare a hare.
Freddy Bender: Objection, Your Honor, strangling the witness.
Judge Marva Munson: I’m going to allow it.
Mrs. Gutman: He had a device he called the Intruder. It was something he had the engineers at the factory design. And then he had a prototype built out of the parts from our vacuum cleaner.
Mrs. Gutman’s Lawyer: I see.
Mrs. Gutman: So the vacuum cleaner wasn’t available to me for several months.
Wrigley: Uh, I’ll just have a, um, salad, please. Um, baby field greens.
Waitress: What did you call me?
Miles Massey: All right, Freddy, forget “Kershner”. What’s your bottom line?
Freddy Bender: Primary residence, 30 percent of remaining assets.
Miles Massey: What, are you nuts? Have you forgotten “Kershner”?
Miles Massey: Attila the Hun. Ivan the Terrible. Henry the Eighth. What do they have in common?
Wrigley: Middle name?
Rex Rexroth: Have you sat before her before?
Miles Massey: No. No, the judge sits first. Then we sit.
Rex Rexroth: Well, have you sat after her before?
Wrigley: Sat after her before? You mean, have we argued before her before?
Miles Massey: The judge sits in judgment. The counsel argues before the judge.
Rex Rexroth: So, have you argued before her before?
Wrigley: Before her before, or before she sat before?
Rex Rexroth: Before her before. I said, before her before.
Wrigley: No, you said before she sat before.
Rex Rexroth: I did at first, but…
Miles Massey: Look, don’t argue.
Rex Rexroth: I’m not. I’m…
Wrigley: No, you don’t argue. We argue.
Miles Massey: Counsel argues.
Wrigley: You appear.
Miles Massey: The judge sits.
Wrigley: Then you sit.
Miles Massey: Or you stand in contempt.
Wrigley: And then we argue.
Miles Massey: The counsel argues.
Rex Rexroth: Which you’ve done before.
Miles Massey: Which we’ve done before.
Rex Rexroth: Ah.
Wrigley: But not before her.